Thank you so much everyone for your lovely comments! Lots of love!

Saturday, 30 May 2009


WARNING - this story contains descriptions of sex and violence!

This happened last weekend.
I don't usually go out very much but that day I couldn't sleep and had to go to the emergency hospital so I could get some sedatives.

It was about two after midnight.
On my way home, rinding my bike past a park, I heard a scream come out of the public toilet.
I then saw a white car left idling nearby and I got scared and quickly rode away.

The next morning I went to the public toilet and found in there torn stockings and knickers, and somehow one high-heel shoe had been left on the floor.
I wondered what happened but found no story relating to it on the newspaper.
That night I couldn't sleep again and took the sedatives I got from the day before.
And as I just sat in my room doing nothing I started thinking about the last night's incident again.

Looking back that was really stupid of me.
For a reason I can't explain, I found myself in the empty park again.
I was scared to go near the toilet so I just watched it sitting on my bike.
Then it happened.

Suddenly a car stopped behind me and three men got out.
I tried to run away but they dragged me inside their car, and then took me to a place that looked like a warehouse.
It seemed there was some sort of gathering going on in there, and at the further end of the room a naked woman sat crying.
Soon they thrust a towel in my mouth and pushed me to the floor.
And then I was raped by one man after another.
The sedatives soon started taking effect and my memory is hazy about what happened towards the end; but I think it was quite a while before I was released and when I woke up in the morning in my room I felt blood and a huge amount of semen flooding out of my private part.
My stomach still hurts, even now.

I used to have a boyfriend.
But we kept our relationship a secret.
When my boyfriend died of AIDS in June this year all his friends became strangers.
I too stopped seeing him the moment he was admitted into the hospital.
But, probably, I have it too.
Recently I keep having a sympton similar to cold.
Just like my boyfriend when he was alive.
The men who raped me last week have all probably been infected.
They deserve it.
I am still 22.
I want to live more.

Sunday, 24 May 2009

My Master Series: Episode 5 "The Toyama Hotel"

There is an experience I still remember vividly.

For the simple reason that it was summer, me and other members of the club decided to visit a haunted place.

The place we chose to explore was the Toyama Hotel*1, which was an abandoned building located on Toyama Pass.

We had done some research on the internet and found a lot of reports of ghost sightings in the place:
"There is a fire-ravaged boiler chamber which is really dangerous."
"We heard voices on the third floor."
"Having found nothing we were about to leave when we saw a shadow hovering around a window on the third floor."
I noticed there were more reports about the third floor than anywhere else.

To set the mood for the event, we first played kokkuri-san*2 at my house and went to the hotel at midnight. As we were a large group - five boys and five girls - we were quite cheery at first but the atmosphere changed as soon as we saw the large ominous shadow of the Toyama Hotel looming ahead of us .

We'd heard we could sneak in the backdoor through the graveyard next to the hotel so we'd come fully prepared wearing easy-to-move clothes, but we found no graveyard.
There was a place next to the hotel which came closest to the description of the graveyard but it turned out to be just a large open space.

"I can't see any graveyards here."
A guy in the group said to me; but when we explored the place more with a flashilight we found a tiered platform, on top of which stood a monolith of strange shape.
"Look, there's some writing on it."
I lit up a section of the monolith and it said: "Memorial for Martyrs."
Oh my god.

The monolith had an endless list of names on it, such as "33rd Showa*3, Lieutenant__"
The eerie presence of the monolith plus the ruins next to it made the girls tearful and even the boys started saying straight-faced, "this place isn't good."
I was also scared but it wouldn't be fun if we just left after having come all this way, so I did my best to calm them down.
We then found a little stream at the further end of the field and by crossing over it we finally managed to get to the hotel's backdoor and enter inside.

Inside was full of rubbish; disused telephones, empty cans... The bathroom and toilets were dirty but seemed new. The wallpapers and carpets were decaying in such a way that was appropriate for ruins.

Because we only had two flashlights among us we tried to stay close together as we went around the building taking hundreds of photos.

The kitchen especially was in good condition with all the utensils and other things like account books remaining intact.
The rumour had it that the hotel went bankrupt after its owner went mad.

We were feeling slightly braver after we had completed the search on the first floor.
Soon we found and climbed the stairs leading to the second floor.

Having arrived on the second floor we were talking about going straight on to the third floor, which was where the most rumours about the hotel stemmed from, when suddenly a phone started ringing.

The shrill sound echoed in the silence.
It was coming from the third floor.
The girls started screaming their heads off.
A wave of terror began to spread among us and some of us started dashing downstairs.
"Hey, you guys, calm down! I said, calm down!"

This was my worst nightmare. Panic could lead to an accident.
I hesitated whether to go up or down but the ringing sound was grating my nerves.
"Don't run. Go down slowly."
I said, feeling like their parent, but the two who had flashlights had already gone downstairs.
Darkness suddenly decended on me and I started feeling chilly. I was soon dashing after them.

When I got to the first floor everyone was gathering in an open space that had once probably been a lobby. Just as I arrived the phone abruptly stopped ringing.

"I want to go home."
One girl said, crying. There was an awkward silence.
The boys too were looking pale.

It was then that the oldest guy in the group spoke up.
He was my Master in the Way of Occult.

"Sorry, sorry. I'm really sorry."
He said, casually taking a mobile out of his pocket.
"I never imagined it would scare you guys this much. I'm sorry."
He then started to explain that he wanted to make the whole exploring experience a little more exciting and had come up with an idea of hiding a mobile on the third floor during the day.
He waited until it was the right moment and made a call to the mobile on the third floor by another mobile in his pocket.
Idiot! Talk about going too far.
Everyone sobered up instantly and we decided to quit it there and then.

On the way home my master said to me,
"That place is crazy."
I nearly told him: no, it's you who are crazy. But he continued.

"When we were looking at the monolith, did you notice the people in the hotel window?"
I didn't. It never entered my mind to look in that direction at the time.
"I thought, being summer, they were just a gang of kids. But when I went inside it became obvious that I had been wrong. There were a lot more than ten of them there. I mean on the upper floor."
"Who do you mean by 'them'?"
"Did you think I had money to spend on an extra mobile just for a prank?"
Oh no.
"That was the hotel's phone. You heard it, right? Rriiiiing."
Of course.

After we sent everyone home my master said something unthinkable.
"OK, shall we go back to the hotel now?"
I begged him on my knees not to go and he let me go.

But apparently in the end he went back there on his own.
A few days later I asked him what happened.
With an inscrutable half-smile, he said:
"When I went back inside the phone started ringing again. I picked it up but all I could hear from it was riiiiiiiiing. I yelled, 'you cowards!' And every phone in the hotel started ringing, all at the same time. Then I knew I was in for trouble and I just ran away."

*1 Toyama Hotel - this used to really exist in Okayama Prefecture but was demolished and turned into a parking space.
*2 Kokkuri-san - the Japapanese version of the ouija board.
Showa Period - the period of Japanese history corresponding to the reign of Emperor Shōwa (Hirohito), from December 25, 1926 to January 7, 1989.

Saturday, 9 May 2009

The Sunflower Dance

Warning - this is a SCREAMER (although mild).

Despite the title it has no reference to sunflowers.


Monday, 4 May 2009

Many Thanks!

Everyone, thank you very much for your comments.

I haven't been able to reply promptly to your comments because I have been busy lately (not just because I'm lazy), but I read all your comments and appreciate them very much.

Thank you!


Sunday, 3 May 2009


NOTE: This is quite a long story so I divided it into THREE parts.


I was 14 at the time when this story took place.

During the winter holiday it was decided that I would go to a holiday cottage, owned by my uncle, in N_ prefecture (though my "uncle" was still in his thirties).
I heard that my uncle originally wanted to go there with his girlfriend, but because they had recently split up he invited me instead.

Me and my uncle had been buddies since I was small and I jumped at the opportunity. My uncle lived in the same town as me, and he came to pick me up at my home early in the morning, and we started for the journey straight away.

My uncle was quite a stylish guy, and he had always taught me things about music and outdoor activities etc etc that I really looked up to him.
The journey took us eight long hours but we enjoyed ourselves by talking and listening to music.

When we were near the destination we bought some food for supper at supermarket.
And after a long climb up a steep hill, we finally arrived at the cottage.

It was a wooden lodge, not large but looked neat and cosy. Below and not far from us we saw a few other holiday cottages like ours, but these seemed empty.

For supper we had barbecue in the garden. After we had eaten enough meat to last our lifetime we moved back inside and played video games in front of the fireplace.
Later in the night our talks turned to ghost stories. My uncle had a deep knowledge on the subject and he really got me scared. I would like to write about his other stories too, if I ever get a chance....

Then, as if he suddenly remembered it, he said, "don't go to the mountain behind the cottage." He said that no local people would ever go near the mountain if they could help it. Maybe it had nothing to do with it, but there was once a CEO who lived in one of the cottages below and he hanged himself in the mountain.

Well, how could I even imagine going there after listening to these stories?
After this we continued talking and playing, and it was nearly five in the morning when we finally went to bed.

I woke up in the bright daylight. It was just past noon. Feeling thirsty, I went downstairs to get some water. On the way I peeped into my uncle's room and he was still deep in the dream world. It was a cold but fresh morning. The air in the countryside was totally different from the one in the city.

I stepped out on the balcony and sat on a chair. The balcony faced the mountain my uncle had told me about on the previous night. The mountain looked just like any other mountains I had ever seen.
I remembered there was a telescope inside the cottage and brought it outside so I could enjoy the beauty of the nature to the full. It was a high-performance telescope and I could see clearly even things that were very far away. When I moved my focus to the mountain I was thrilled to see some birds resting on the branches that looked like they were right in front of me.

For about half an hour I was totally engrossed in looking into the telescope, until I noticed something was moving among the trees on the mountain side.

A man? That was what it looked like. I could see the man's back. His head was totally hairless. He kept swaying back and forth. A local man? A dance? In his hand was a large scythe. It was just unbelievable that someone could be naked outside in this cold weather. Was it a part of a festival? But he was alone.

I was confused and a lot of thoughts entered my mind. Because I was facing his back I couldn't see his face. His movement reminded me of Sankai Juku*1

I must not watch it any further.

I instinctively sensed danger. He was probably someone a bit funny in the head. It was freaky. But my curiosity took the better of me. I set the zoom level to max. The hairless head - it was pure white. It gave me a chill.

Just then the guy, still dancing, turned around slowly towards me. On the first look the guy's face gave an appearance of having an ordinary human face. It had a nose and a mouth; but it had no eyebrows and there was only one eye at the top of the nose - the eye which vertically opened. I trembled. One-eyed. Demented and deformed*2. Our eyes met through the lens. The guy twisted his lips. He was smiling.


The moment our eyes met I let out a scream. I couldn't stop crying. I just wanted to die. I was suddenly overcome by a strong feeling of depression. I wanna die I wanna die.... I was half crazed and kept running around the room when my uncle came rushing in.
"What's happened?"
"The telescope! The mountain!"
My uncle looked through the telescope.

He let out an indecipherable groan and put his head in his hands. He was crying.

By this time I had become a little calmer and asked,
"What's the hell was that!!"
"__koooh! ___kooooh!!*3," he kept shouting his ex-girlfriend's name, while crying uncontrollably. I've got to do something, I thought, and for the first time in my life I hit someone really hard in his face.
My uncle's body shook. Ten seconds...twenty seconds were gone before he finally looked at me.

"Listen. there are sunglasses in the desk in my room . Bring them over here. One for me and one for you as well"
"Just do it!!!"

I handed him the sunglasses as I was told. With shaking hands he put the sunglasses on and looked through the telescope. He moved the telescope around.

He said, and beckoned to me.
"Put on the sunglasses and look."
Fearfully I put the glasses on and looked through the telescope.
Although it was somewhat harder to see because of the sunglasses, I found the creature among the trees and our eyes met again. An unnameable fear gripped me but the feeling was not as strong as before. Still, my heart kept beating wildly.

But what caught my attention most was that the creature wasn't in the same place as I first saw him... The creature kept performing a weird jelly-fish like dance: despite the wild movement he kept a steady gaze towards our direction.
Was he moving down the mountain - to get here!?

"Do you want to pee?"
"What? Why now, of all the times!?"
"If you do, go and pee it into that empty bottle in the kitchen."
Saying thus, my uncle went downstairs. I couldn't possibly think of doing it at a time like this and I just stood there dumbfounded. Soon my uncle came back with a bottle into which he had poured his urine.
"When you feel like peeing use this," he said, and handed me an empty bottle.

"I mean, what on earth is that creature?"
"Yama-no-mono(a thing of mountain)... Yamako (mountain child).... I don't know. But when I was a kid I used to go camping in mountains with my father...oh, no, not that mountain! In mountains strange things can happen... We once heard people talking outside our tent at night even though there was nobody there. When things like that happened we would spray some urine around and the sounds would stop..."
He peered into the telescope once more.

"Damn it!"
Despite looking obviously distressed, he seemed he was trying his best to observe the creature.
"That thing... I don't know exactly at what speed but it's moving very slowly. Now I've lost him.. But there is no doubt he's moving towards this cottage."
"Well, we've got to get out of here and run away!"
"That wouldn't make any difference, probably... Unless we can divert his interest to something else he will follow us, to the world's end. This is a kind of curse. You write 'evil eye' and read it 'jashi'..."
"You said that word that before. How come you know so much about it?"

"Once I was travelling in Northern Europe -. Well, I'll talk about that later if we can come out of this alive."
"What do you mean by 'if we can come out of this alive'? Are we just gonna wait here like idiots until that creature comes for us?"
"No. We're going to counter-attack him."

My opinion was to stay put and hide in the cottage, but my uncle said that we had to do something before the creature reached us. I thought it would be far better to just run away than go and meet the ghastly thing, but I had always trusted my uncle. In the end, out of my respect for him, I decided to follow his decision.

Carrying the sunglasses, bottle, light snacks, binocular, wooden bat, and flashlight for each of us, we went to the mountain. My uncle said he wanted to finish it all before it got dark.

Could we really fight against its baleful eye? Was having sunglasses enough to endure eyeing the creature at close range? A lot of thoughts were running around in my head.

The mountain was a bigger place than I had expected. With binoculars in our hands, we searched around for the creature for a while, but my uncle said because the creature was moving towards us we would run into each other eventually.

It would be dangerous to go too far in the mountain as it was getting dark, so we decided to wait for the creature in an open area about 500 m from our cottage.

"As I said, all we've got to do is divert its interest from us...that's all we have to do.."
"We have to get close to him, that's for sure. But don't look straight into his eyes. You've got to see him sideways. You know what I'm talking about, don't you? Try to locate him without making an eye contact. And then splash urine over him. If that doesn't work - you listening? I'm serious - if that doesn't work, show your penis to him."
"Jashi hates things unclean, like feces and urine, and sex organs... It won't kill him but it could make him go away; it would mean we have some hope of saving ourselves."
"What if it doesn't work?"
"Then we would have to run away. By car."

Wrapped up in an undefinable terror we sat on the rocks and waited. We took turns looking into the binoculars. It was four in the evening.

Go to Jashi #2

*1 Sankai Juku - an avant-garde dance group specializing in a type of dance called "Ankoku Butoh" meaning "dance of darkness."

*2 Demented and deformed - I say this again to avoid misunderstandings: I have nothing against people with any form of disability. I am not the author of this story (I'm only translating it) and I am sorry if this story has offended someone with its use of certain discriminatory words.

*3 _kooh - indicating the uncle is shouting a girl's name ending with "ko," like Yoko Ono. From the end of WW2 until recently (as far as I know), using "ko(meaning "little,""child") to end a girl's name with was a popular practice. But the popularity has been waning somewhat in recent years and it is now rarer to find little girls with "ko" at the end of their names. The use of "ko" has connotations of being old fashioned and formal.